英國人給我的印象就象它的天氣，陰沈沈的，蘿琳是個例外，她總是陽光明媚。到英國的第壹周就碰上公司開聖誕餐會，我和蘿琳在同壹桌相鄰而坐。她不到五十歲，象BBC裏壹個主持人，出口就是地道的英式幽默，壹句話轉了好幾個圈，等我明白過來笑出聲時，同事們的話題都換了好幾個。

我們的第壹話題是把美國人給奚落壹通。美國人，她笑著搖腦袋，眼睛看著遠處，太自大了。她在紐約住過壹陣子，那邊也有自己的親戚。她尤其對美國教育孩子的態度頗有微辭，他們教育的孩子簡直是胡來，孩子都被寵壞了，沒有禮貌。她有壹個小男孩，十歲左右，我問她怎麼選學校。蘿琳則從如何搬家，提前多長時間如何排隊申請，英國的“PUBLIC SCHOOL”其實是私立學校，而真正的公立學校卻叫國立學校等等如數家珍…看得出來孩子和家庭幾乎是她的全部，她有壹整套培養孩子的想法，有不少和我的外公那壹代人的想法有異曲同工之處。

她隨和親切，和壹般假模假式拿腔拿調的英國人全然不同。聖誕那次聚會後，每次走到我辦公室門口時，她總是進來和我聊聊天。公司還沒有搬到新樓，每人都有壹個辦公室。英國人很少主動和人打招呼的，她笑呵呵地走進來時，我總問有事要我幫忙嗎？Nothing, just chatting她笑笑。

要問英國人最擅長什麼？粗略壹想，恐怕是抱怨。平常只要壹尖耳朵，就能聽到 “火車沒法坐, 天天誤點”，“餐廳裏的咖啡沒法喝”，“昨天的午餐太難吃”，“法國人真是難纏”…. 我從來沒有聽到蘿琳抱怨，她總是帶著微笑，或者開玩笑安慰抱怨的人。公司隨著規模不斷擴大，總部也開始擴張，從幾十個人到幾百人，難免有成長的煩惱。比如共享的辦公用品不翼而飛，比如張三的午餐不小心被李四給吃了，大家性格各異，有人怒目, 有人抱怨。壹日蘿琳四處找壹個標簽打印機，沒有找到，很快大夥收到壹封電子郵件，發件人: 蘿琳；收件人: 大樓全體成員；主題：標簽打印機：

From: Lorraine Sadkowski
To: DukesCourtUsers
Subject: Label machine

Dear All

Will the person who has kidnapped the label machine, please return it to the photocopier room. No ransom will be paid!
Thanks

Lorraine

接著，就聽到壹陣爆笑從不同的辦公室裏傳出來。

我那時正為英國處事和交流方式迷盲爭紮，在日常的公司協調，美國那壹套不太管用, 我的性格也沒有美國人那麼強勢。英國的文化讓我覺得有點無所適從，非常郁悶, 似乎個個巧舌如簧，但是大多口是心非，they don’t say what they mean。蘿琳看我有些低沈，偶爾問問，還好嗎，沒事吧？然後講兩句笑話，讓我能暫時忘記煩惱，她總那麼輕松樂觀。

去年休假前的周五下午碰到蘿琳來辦公室小敘，問周末去哪裏，告去羅馬，於是談起壹通意大利人的故事。扔下壹句話：Please say hello to the Pope. 她樂呵呵地揚長而去，我在那裏傻呼呼的笑著不知道該說什麼。

就這麼過了快兩年了，9月初壹天下午收到公司法律總監的壹封信，他是蘿琳的老板。大意是說：“妳們中很多人知道這幾年來蘿琳壹直在和癌癥搏鬥，過去這壹個月她的病情有了大的變化，我很難過，診斷的情況不太好。對我們很多人來說，蘿琳是多年的朋友和同事，我知道他很樂意聽到朋友們的壹些話。我們想錄下壹些話送給她，應該對她很有意義。如果妳願意給她說再見或者幾句祝願，簡會拿個攝像機在大樓裏轉。她的地址也在這裏，如果妳願意寫信的話。” 我讀了好幾遍，以確保我看明白了。

過了兩天，收到蘿琳的信, 通過另壹個同事發來：

From: Greg Martin On Behalf Of Lorraine Sadkowski
Sent: 12 September 2005 16:01
Subject:

For those of you who did not know, most of my career with S Company has involved breast cancer. This moved to the liver and for the past several years Mount Alvernia hospital has been "home from home" for that constant chemotherapy, which has kept me going for longer that I had a right to expect. This has given me more time with my family and more time to watch my son grow up, for which I am eternally grateful.

The BIG C has now caught up but it is not so bad. I have had long enough to get used to it, am in no pain and cannot be sad. I don't want anyone else to be sad either, as it is a relief not to have to worry any more.

I would like to especially thank Stephen for his continued and unconditional support during the past years. The door was always open to be able to talk.

I would like to thank Greg for his totally outrageous sense of humour, Adrian for the philosophical chats and Julia and Holly for the gossip.

Finally, but by no means least, I would like to thank Diane Crawley in the Jo'burg office for her constant calls and pep talks and for caring so much - a real friend.

That's it then - no "Get Well" cards and no more bloody flowers.

If anyone wants to make a donation, the details are as follows:

Mount Alvernia Hospital, Chemotherapy Day Unit, Harvey Road, Guildford, Surrey, GU1 3LX

Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice, Waverley Lane, Farnham, Surrey, GU9 8BL

I have really enjoyed my time with all my colleagues and friends at S Company and I wish you all a long and healthy life.

Lorraine

這是壹封簡單的信，我又讀了好幾遍，如果不了解她的為人，有些細微處難以理解。她已經做好放棄的準備, 向大家告別，中間竟然還帶著她天生的幽默， 我不知道該做什麼，眼睛有點模糊，在舊的電子郵件裏搜索和她曾經的通信。發現這壹封：

From: Lorraine Sadkowski
Sent: 13 April 2004 10:20
To: W
Subject: RE: organizational chart
W

Hoping to buy some chocolate eggs half price today!

Assuming you mean a people chart and not a subsidiary company chart, I don't have an overall chart - maybe try Alison H (Karen R is on holiday, I believe) or Ian O.

Otherwise you may have to pull one together. Jayne H might have a Finance one and some of the secretaries may have departmental ones (e.g. Patricia C (Tax), Felicity C (Company Secretarial) Sharon R ..............)


Regards

Lorraine

我要壹份整體人員組織結構圖，她沒有，要是我給人回復，就會說抱歉試試人力資源部吧。她給我列出了所有可能的人的名字。沒有忘記讓我去買巧克力蛋，那天好象復活節剛過, 壹定是半價大摔賣。
….

我知道自己必須做點什麼，應該讓她知道她給我的印象和心底的感動。我去錄像，壹屋子的人都有些緊張，不知道該說什麼，我錄完之後總覺得不很滿意，眼睛好象沒有看著鏡頭，有幾句應該換個說法更好壹些……

壹周後，錄像帶好象還沒有寄出去。另外壹個同事周末去看了她說情況有些不好，我決定把我想說的話寫下來，郵寄給她。

兩天後，蘿琳離開這個世界。兩周後我們參加了葬禮，葬禮的要求是蘿琳定的：“不要正式的深色西裝革履，要穿粉紅色的衣服；不要帶鮮花，如果願意的話，捐壹點錢給乳腺癌學會；如果要帶的話，帶壹點笑聲和對她的回憶”

葬禮很簡潔，在綠色的墓園中，壹大群粉紅的衣服，她的棺材擡進來，親人隨後，然後入座，很多朋友只能站在兩邊，很多公司以前的員工都回來了。蘿琳的丈夫，孩子，親人致辭，沒有牧師的禱告，還是聽到哭泣。

她的孩子十二歲，剛剛上中學。念了壹段媽媽留下的話：孩子，不要站在媽媽的墳頭哭泣，因為我不在那裏；妳早晨醒來的時候，我是第壹縷照在妳身上的陽光，夜晚，我是妳窗外樹上唱歌的夜鶯….

有疑惑的時候要多和爸爸交流；
不要和妳第壹個愛上的女人就結婚;
….”

蘿琳的丈夫彼得說，蘿琳的善良和樂觀是他和孩子這壹生只能仰望而無法啟及的榜樣，他不會去試圖總結蘿琳的壹生，因為每壹句說出的話後面都有壹百句想說而沒機會說的話，但是，他今天要給大家讀壹封信，來自壹個和蘿琳只交往了兩年的壹個年青人。

這封信是我寫的。

“
Dear Lorraine,

I did not know that you are ill until two weeks ago when Stephen S sent the email out, as you have always been joking, smiling and light-hearted. I recorded my message with Jayne H’s help in sending my best wishes. Without knowing when you will be able to see the video, I decide to write down my thoughts and mail it to you.

You might remember that we first met in the 2003 Christmas Party where we sat next to each other in the same table. That was the first week I arrived in UK, and that day was also my birthday. I did not expect the host announced that and asked everyone to sing the Happy Birthday song to me. I was very uneasy at that moment.

We talked a lot and I heard stories about your lovely boy and family, feel how much love you have for them.

Since then you often approached me and had a little chat whenever you saw me. That means a lot to a young man coming from thousands of miles away and struggling to fit the new culture. I want to let you know how much I appreciate your friendly smiles, pleasant conversations, and good sense of humour.

You might find that I did not always get your sense of humour. It is often several hours later or sometimes two or three days later after our conversation, I figured it out, and realized how funny it was then I burst into laughter for a long while. My wife would look at me and be puzzled at the silly smiles on my face without knowing what happened. I do appreciate your sense of humour, though a little bit slow and late.

I do not know whether I mentioned to you or not, I was a foreign services officer for seven years with institutions like United Nations before I came to the business world. I met many people from different professions and different countries. You are the most graceful lady I’ve ever met.

W

在彼得讀這封信的時候，我看到他眼中的淚光聽到周圍哭泣和笑聲。